Past, present & Future - part 3

Into the fire!

Although I’ve heard it said many times that Christianity isn’t a bed of roses, I’ve never heard anyone preach that it is! So why do they keep preaching that it isn’t? None so strange as folks is there? Long ago I remember an old preacher referring to the prophet Malachi’s story of the goldsmith refining his gold (Mal. chapter 3). The ore is heated in the crucible until dirt appears on the surface. This gets skimmed off, then more heat, more dross and so the process continues until the goldsmith sees his face in the liquid surface just as if looking in a mirror. The prophet Zechariah said that God would refine His people like gold until each will say, "The Lord is my God!"

Colin 60 years ago!

Becoming a Christian and especially becoming a pastor means jumping into the fire, God’s fire! For me as a lonely child with no parents for the war years, becoming a Christian was realising God loved me and Jesus died for me; receiving His forgiveness and love and His everlasting life. I was so overwhelmed that I gave my life to Him. I had found my "Everlasting Father". Bed of roses? No! But a new relationship that was going into the fire of testing and discovering that God loved me but was not satisfied with me! Yet His presence was with me through all the fiery ordeals. Into the fire until He could see His face, His character reflected in me (and there’s still a way to go)!

School meant being the odd one out, having Christian ideals and morals and finding the other boys thought I was different and unfriendly. College meant fierce debates with contemporaries about sexuality and God being a ’spoil-sport’! But at two in the morning, some would creep into my room to confess they had a bad conscience after their night’s exploits. Frequent criticism made me examine my beliefs, my relationship with Jesus. It caused me to consolidate some and discard some. I rejected religion but searched deeper for reality with Jesus.

Handing out the provisions at youth camp

Teaching brought much the same problems but I wanted to share the vision, joy and peace of the relationship with others. Youth clubs, camps, hotel parties brought opportunity to share this with young people. With help from others many youths found the way to walk with Jesus, the excitement to be God’s family, to find each other as brothers and sisters. Sometimes the college had 100, 200 meeting during the week as the ’Christian Union’ (maybe, you, dear reader, were there!). Then the authorities asked me to stop running the CU. I was confused, angry. God had forgotten me. No answers to my prayers. A real fiery ordeal! Later, upon reflection I saw I had been freed from educational authority (with their difficulty to understand what was happening). Now I could obey God but be responsible!

I asked my church if the young people could meet there. They refused. More confusion! More turmoil! I wanted to be a ’good boy’, to conform but found myself outside and alone. "Oh God, what are You doing with me?" No answer. Later I saw I was free but had to trust God for direction and resources. He was building my faith, teaching me to listen (tough for a teacher!). God had me where He wanted me, to lead me into places my church was not free to go. 1969 saw £891 donated to us when no appeals were given. There was no place to rebel against leaders, no divisiveness. We could start with a clean sheet.

Another ordeal lurking! Front page of the town’s newspaper, main headlines (there must have been a dearth of news!) accused me and destroyed my reputation. I had been to the Bishop of Plymouth to refute untrue rumours. News had leaked. My church wanted to disown me. More confusion, rejection, trouble and strained relationships. As I grumbled to God I knew He was saying, "Jesus gave up His reputation for you. Will you give yours for Him?" I was free. I never knew what a weight it was to worry about my reputation. The young people got into prayer, more joined in curiosity because of the news. The group grew bigger and stronger. (cont...)

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