orgiveness is needed when a relationship has been damaged by a wrong done by one person to another. Lack of forgiveness damages both the person wronged and the person who caused the wrong. Histories of families and friendships are sadly littered with stories of wrongs done that have gone unacknowledged and unforgiven. Everyone is a loser.

I’ve heard it said that we know that we have forgiven someone when we can look them full in the face and know that the wrong does not matter. That is not ignoring the wrong, the contrary is true. It is acknowledging the full effect of the wrong and choosing not to hold it against the other. Without that acknowledgement there cannot be forgiveness.

To fully restore a hurt relationship, forgiveness needs to be a two way process. It requires action by both people. It is one thing for the person wronged to say that the wrong no longer matters and offer forgiveness. For the relationship to be healed wholly the person who caused the wrong has to acknowledge his action and put it right.

he forgiveness that Jesus offers us for the wrongs that we have done to him is of no value to us until we acknowledge our sin and turn away from it and decide to continue it no longer. Then, and only then, are we able to enjoy the benefit of his forgiveness and the relationship is restored and enjoyed for the future.

So it is with our human relationships. Our sins against Jesus are worse than the things that we do to one another. His example is the one that we should follow - he said that we cannot enjoy his forgiveness if we do not forgive one another. Isn’t it better to live in clear enjoyable relationships with one another than the bitterness and unhappiness of unforgiveness?

Jeremy

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